Be, Do, Have: Why This Principle Is So Important On Any Weight Loss Journey

by Michelle Burton

About nine years ago I took a self-development course. When I took this training, I heard this statement for the first time: Be, Do, Have.

Be, Do, Have is being the person you want to be and then you do what that person would do, to have what they would have.

Most people have it backwards. Most people think they must Do, Have, Be. Here is a great scenario:  I will go on Weight Watchers (the doing), then I will have a sexy body(have), and I will be happy (be).

Oprah is a great example of a person “being.” If you asked Oprah how does she stay on top in her field, she really could not  articulate it. That is because she is “being” the person she needs to be to have the top rated talk show for 25 years in a row.

Meryl Streep is another person who exemplifies “being.” It seems that for every film she performs in she  gets nominated for an academy award. And again, if you asked her how she does it, she probably could not really tell you. This is because she is “being.” The “doing” shows through in her great acting ability.

When I took that leadership training nine years ago, I realized that I needed to focus on “being” the person I needed to be to accomplish a goal that I wanted instead of “doing” actions, such as “I am doing Weight Watchers,” or “I am doing low carb.” I needed to “be” healthy or “be” slim. I began to ask the question how would a slim, healthy person behave? Then I took actions accordingly.

That is one reason why I do not really agree with weight loss surgery. With weight loss surgery, you are “doing” an action  believing it will lead to weight loss. But the question that needs to be asked is, “What person must you “be” to drop 100+ pounds?”

A friend of mine had gastric bypass about four years ago and she was losing lots of weight. She was struggling with eating less and I made the statement to her,” You did the “doing” part of shrinking your stomach surgically, now you must do the “being” part which is much tougher because now you have to change your thinking.” Needless to say we are not friends any more.

The “being” part is in the brain. It is changing negative habits. It is being aware of your thoughts and actions. It is changing old tapes in your mind. It is discipline, and yes it is hard work.

Now that I am much thinner, I often get the question, “How did you lose weight?” This question is quite difficult to answer sometimes because I realize that I am now in the “being” phase of my weight loss. Many people are expecting to hear that I did some weight loss program such as Weight Watchers, Nutri-System, or Jenny Craig.  What people do not realize is that I had to “be” a different person to lose 60 pounds. Now my low-carb way of eating is truly a part of who I am as a person.

So my question to you is not what diet program will you “do”, but what person must you “be” to “have” the weight loss and health success you desire?

Michelle can be reached at or go to her blog,

Copyright ©2010 by Michelle Burton

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Comments (1)


  1. Lady Diannia says:

    Loved the article…I know a lot of ladies that are fighting this battle and I am re-posting this on my FACEOOK PAGE.

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