Starting Over Again

By Karen L. Donald

As a Inner Healing Coach , the foundation of my clinics and workshops are to redirect the mindsets of those who are in attendance. Anyone who is looking for healing in their lives and deliverance from their past must learn how to start over again. We develop habits that are not positive or healthy as a result of our past traumas and disappointments. At the time that they happen, we never really know how they will affect our future.

Many people who are living “in the box” are there because of what someone said or did to them, even as young children. Words of discouragement like “you will never amount to anything”, “stupid”, “nothing but a big baby”, and more are framing the world of many adults daily. There are decisions that need to be made and accomplishments to achieve that will not without moving forward from your past.

Words play a very important part. We develop habits in life based upon those comments and ideas about us. Never being able to bounce back and take control, because we never knew we lost it. Starting over again in our lives first means that we must admit some real truths about our life and us.

You have to assess your life. We spend everyday letting others tell us what is wrong or right. What do you think about you?

Be honest with yourself. It is much easier to admit those things that are wrong when you are all alone. You have to honestly look at circumstances around you. There are some problems that we cannot fix, some that others caused and many that we brought about on ourselves because of bad decisions or just not knowing.

Pain caused by the abuse of others is not your fault! You cannot live in a rewind state of mind everyday thinking about what happened to you. Guilt is a killer. It destroys or dreams and desires for any good thing in life. If you have been the victim of any form of abuse, the most important thing that you must consider right now is that IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!

Begin the healing process. Find therapy and counseling within your community, church or even close friends or family. Be very careful whom you discuss your problems with because everyone will not understand your hurt. Once you are comfortable with your choice, begin to let those things go that have been hidden for years. It is a continual process. So be patient with yourself.

Turn your emptiness into empowerment. The greatest words and deeds that you can share with others are the hope and promise of a better tomorrow. Only a person who has survived to see tomorrow can inspire and empower someone who feels that all in life has failed. After you have done just these few things, you can begin to start over again. I use the word “begin” so that we all can remember that there is a starting point to everything, including healing.

What is starting over again? It is that feeling that you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that you are still here. No matter the pain that you felt in yesterday, no matter the tears that were cried in the past and even the disappointments that seemed to take away your hopes for a future, you are still around to tell the story.

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