Wilder in Real Life: I’m Getting My Happy Back…

The title is according to Nene Leakes on “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” in reference to her marital issues.  Yep, I’m a fan.

It seems like another quote for the books like “getting sexy or groove back,” but for Leakes, many unhappy people, and myself it’s not.  Maybe it’s a good thing if it becomes a trending topic on Twitter or some motivation quote to used in commercials.   If it this gets marketed, I want my cut.

Anyway,  I read an article on this month’s topic in March 2011 issue of Essence Magazine.

As I flipped toward the end of the magazine I came across the piece titled, “The Happiness Quest.”  Now, I’ve been on this quest for a minute, but this made me smile as I agreed with a few of the the ideas that I practice:

  • Turning off the television.  Don’t live through these people, go do something.
  • Surrounding thyself with happy people.
  • Be optimistic.   Even pretend and you’ll start to believe it.
  • Stop complaining, but it’s OK to vent.

I suggest if you need a bit of help figuring that out then this a nice little guide without having to hide in the “self help” section of the bookstore.

Going back to Leakes, it feels like a fictional character in a book who is going through hard time, but she’s real right on the screen into my living room.  You see the turmoil in her marriage and her spark begins to fade.  I don’t know this woman from a can of paint, but I definitely feel for her.  Honestly, I think a lot of her blowups are attributed to her stress.  I remember an episode where she was in bed and a friend who’s not a member of the cast came by.  Leakes said something on the lines of not wanting to see anyone or do anything.  I thought to myself that this woman needs to run towards happiness, now.

Everything you want in life requires work, period, even your peace.  When you really want something you’ll do everything in your power to get it.  Let the people, the job, the house, or even a coat* go just so you can find that place of joy.

A few days prior to writing this installment I listened to a song, “Dog Days Are Over,” by Florence + the Machine.  It talks about how the rough times are over, but run from happiness because the end result will be unhappiness again.  That’s life and everything is temporary though some periods last longer than others.

Point blank you have to want it and not be afraid of getting hurt because that’s the inevitable.  If you push for happiness the days of your life then disappointment will be taken like a grain of salt.  I had to reevaluate my reason for being in Chicago for the umpteenth time, it’s silly really.   I came here to start my life and what comes next is in my hands.

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